Thank you so much for listening! I really appreciate every listener, and would love you to subscribe and leave a review wherever you get your podcasts. She is now a narcissist recovery and marriage counsellor helping others to deal with a narcissistic parent. She left the corporate world to help people from toxic families get unstuck & find their authentic selves. After discovering her mother’s narcissism, she learnt to break free from narcissistic control and overcame the bonds of family enmeshment. She is the daughter of a narcissistic mother. Marie was born and raised in Singapore and currently lives in the United States. Marie thought love was a myth thanks to being parented by a narcissist When her son was born she realised the relationship was unsustainable and ‘broke up’ with her mum. She made some mistakes along the way by trying to repair her relationship with her mother, but ultimately she had to remove her from her life in order to recover fully. In her early twenties, Marie confided in a friend who encouraged her to see a therapist for codependency counselling and mental health support. She couldn’t believe her boyfriend when he told her he loved her, because she couldn’t see why he would. She eventually realised that she suffered from codependency she felt responsible for other people’s feelings, and didn’t know how to feel about herself in the absence of someone else’s opinion. She was used to conforming, to getting things wrong, to knowing that she was unacceptable. When Marie left to go to university she struggled to know where she fit in. She was met with denial and defensiveness, and says that it’s usually a hopeless endeavour. Marie describes the process of standing up to her narcissistic mother as counter-productive. Marie says that if she confronted her mother today, she would deny any wrongdoing, defensively justifying her behaviour by saying that Marie was a difficult child. The difference between a normal person and a narcissist is that most people will take responsibility when they’ve upset someone else a narcissist will defend themselves and would never dream of apologising for the hurt they’ve caused. Marie’s mother regularly complained to her daughter about her own problems, and expected her to give comfort. This is called parentification, where a parent offloads adult problems and feelings on their child, expecting them to take responsibility for their parent’s emotions. Marie’s mother went one step further by blaming her daughter for the distress she herself felt at the suggestion that Marie couldn’t trust her mother with her feelings.
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